I’m selfish

There. I said it. And if you think I’m bad now, you should have seen me before.

For most of my life, people were mere objects to me–things to be obtained, circumvented, or disposed of. If I couldn’t get what I wanted from a person, I rid them from my life without regard for their feelings.

Burn all the bridges if it doesn’t get me what I want — this was my modus operandi for many years.

I was fully in touch with my own feelings back then–my likes and dislikes, what made me tick–but I didn’t care about those things in other people because I couldn’t think beyond myself.

And if I ever did care about those things in other people, it always boiled down to how I would benefit, what the person or the situation could do for me.

Selflessness is by no means a forte of mine now, but thinking beyond myself comes much more easily than it did before.

I also find that learning about other people — their interests, their struggles — is now so much more fulfilling than talking about myself.

I’ve come a long way….but I still have a long, long way to go.

– Date of writing unknown